Day 146 of 365

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Day 146 of 365

Again, I stayed with him because he made me feel as if he was going to change, and again, he didn’t. At this point, I was MISERABLE. Every. Single. Day. And I kept going back. I lost friends over it, my family didn’t treat me the same,

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Day 145 of 365

Day 145 of 365

This is where it all began to change. He was always jealous of my friends including my best friend of 6years which sadly because of his jealousy I stopped talking to everyone one of my friends.

Day 144 of 365

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Day 144 of 365

He would get upset with me and my mom because I refused to go with him anywhere alone. He never hurt me physically or verbally but he would abuse my brothers who were 1 and 2 years younger than me

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Day 143 of 365

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Day 143 of 365

I remember my ex saying no and his friends saying “if you don’t someone else will” I wasn’t sure what exactly they meant. My ex came in and shut the door and locked it.

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Day 142 of 365

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Day 142 of 365

Anytime anyone mentioned what happen to me I instantly would always shut them out because I couldn’t handle talking about it because I was told not to.

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Day 141 of 365

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Day 141 of 365

I found myself with a boy who I thought loved me more than anything. My parents had recently separated and I was left alone a lot. I felt less lonely without him. At first it was fun, we went to parties together, we were inseparable.

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Day 140 of 365

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Day 140 of 365

For four years I was with a guy who I thought was the one. For his sake, I’ll call him Hayden. Hayden was everything I wanted in a man, a friend, humorous, musical, strong, and brave. At least that’s what he led me to believe he was...

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Day 139 of 365

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Day 139 of 365

He got back into the car and started driving again he then touched my thigh and was rubbing my leg I told him I was 16 and he said don’t worry babe it doesn’t matter age is just a number, I told him I felt uncomfortable

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Day 138 of 365

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Day 138 of 365

I used to say your name under my breath, because I liked the way it so effortlessly rolled off my tongue. Our relationship seemed just like that. Effortless. You loved my quirkiness and my need for adventure, I loved your humor and your devotion.

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Day 137 of 365

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Day 137 of 365

I have been diagnosed so far with severe depression, extreme social anxiety and PTSD, and I am still being assessed for other potential disorders.

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Day 136 of 365

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Day 136 of 365

He shut and locked the door. In that room I was forced to have sex with him. In that room, he told me I would get in trouble if I told my mum. I kept it quiet.

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Day 135 of 365

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Day 135 of 365

After that it was just a string of awful relationships. Constantly getting cheated on, gas lighted, verbally abused and lied to. I thought I wasn’t worth anything to anybody.

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Day 134 of 365

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Day 134 of 365

I stretched out and got comfortable thinking he would go to the recliner but he didn’t. He came back and started touching me. I froze. I didn’t scream or yell. I just said no and kept pushing him away.

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Day 133 of 365

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Day 133 of 365

I felt violated but like somehow it wasn't valid because I had said yes to sex before that and that made dealing with the whole situation really hard for me even without me reporting it.

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Day 132 of 365

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Day 132 of 365

I didn't even know I was sexually assaulted until I told my friend, and she told me that even though I went there to have sex that it was the circumstances behind it that screamed rape to her.

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Day 131 of 365

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Day 131 of 365

When he was done I was positive he was going to kill me. But he didn't. He threw my knife and walked away. I was so shaken, I walked to Bourbon Street, sat at a bar, and ordered a drink. I never reported it to the police.

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Day 130 of 365

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Day 130 of 365

Then he stopped, took me off his lap, and went back to my mother’s room. I couldn’t process what had just happened because I was never taught about sexual abuse.

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Day 129 of 365

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Day 129 of 365

He always verbally put her down all the time, and sexually abused her. My sister and I were taken from my mom when I was six, and her five. After four years

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Day 128 of 365

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Day 128 of 365

Not only her but her children as well. The abuse started before the marriage was even decided on but my mother “loved” him. As I grew up my perception of love was you could say a little jumbled. I would see my step father hit my mother and watch blood dripping down her mouth.

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Day 127 of 365

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Day 127 of 365

Another is that I had an ex who was extremely suicidal. Maxed out my credit card because he always said that he was going to kill himself because he couldn't pay for x y and z so made me feel guilty

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